^blccms.

it HURTS, obviously. 

as a natural born fighter, he’s used to the pain, used to lying about it and grinning and spitting his blood in the face of his opponent. but deep down every hit hurts. what makes it somewhat possible to ignore is the intent – the other guy only wants you on the ground for glory, just to win.

what makes this hit really hurt is that it’s coming from dylan ( who just days ago fixed his broken face ), and it’s coming form him because he’s angry /// scared /// hurt and charlie can’t reach him.

he may have rebroken his nose – the fourth time – or there may now be a bruise on his cheek. maybe his jaw is swollen. all he can think of is he’s not even surprised, he knew this would happen, why the hell does it hurt so bad?

a hand covers the bruised area as he stands again, stone faced, willing to take another hit if he needed to.

               “you’re gonna have to do a hell of a lot worse than that for me to give up on you, dylan.”

          <sup>(    kill him    //    take his bones    &&    grind them up    //    punch him until he can no longer breathe    )

          (    kill yourself    //    pound yourself into mush    //    serve yourself up to whatever god exists    &&    hope they accept your heavily beaten soul    ) 

          oh    ,    HELL    ,    WHAT    HAVE    YOU    DONE    ?    broken everything    ,    ruined it all  .    dylan’s fingers jitter    ,    bottle placed down    (    far more heavily than was meant    )    ,    feet slowly shuffling his entire body backwards to avoid what seems to him to be inevitable retribution    ,    whatever form it should take  .    expression quickly falls from    ANGER    to    GUILT    //    GUILT    //    GUILT  .    it’s a guilt that will never subside    ,    will never leave him    ,    not through years    ,    or decades  .    in his shallow grave    ,    he will be turning with the    HEART - WRENCHING    PAIN    he feels in this moment  .    KEEP    SHUFFLING    //    KEEP    MOVING    //    BACK    YOURSELF    INTO    A    HATEFUL    HOLLOW    CORNER    //    SLIDE    DOWN    THE    WALL  . 

                    ‘     oh         -    oh    GOD    ,    i’m so         -    m’so s         -    SO    SORRY  .     ’

          dylan begins to cry    ,    filled with the    SELF - ASSURED    KNOWLEDGE    that charlie will hate him forever  .    HORRIBLE    //    HORRIBLE    //    HORRIBLE    //    CRUEL    //    CRUEL    //    CRUEL    //    MONSTROUS    //    MONSTROUS    //    MONSTROUS  .    in this moment    ,    he is prepared to die  .

                    ‘     p - p         -     P L E A S E  .     ’</sup>

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